Are Good Intentions Enough?

by Andrea Blundell “The road to hell is paved with good intentions,” according to an unknown proverb. Would psychologists beg to differ?  The meaning of intention What are we really talking about when we talk about our intentions? It  refers to the reasons we do things. Of course [Read Entire Story]

How to Show Respect in Relationships – And Why You Might Have it Wrong

The word ‘respect’ gets thrown around a lot. But what does it really mean to show respect in relationships? “You don’t respect me” It’s a common way to shut someone down in a discussion or argument. “Yeah well you don’t respect me!”  What we are really saying can be: I don’t feel listened to I … [Read Entire Story]

What is Reverse Psychology? And is it Damaging Your Relationships?

by Andrea Blundell Pretend you want what you don’t, in order to get what you do? What is reverse psychology, really, and is it good or bad for our relationships? What is reverse psychology? At the heart of the concept is the assumption that most people don’t like being told what to do. So how … [Read Entire Story]

Promiscuity and Depression – Can Casual Sex Bring You Down?

Into casual sex, but then suffer from low moods? And wonder if your promiscuity and depression might be at all connected? Does casual sex affect your mood? It’s challenging for psychologists to study casual sex. They obviously have to rely on secondary reporting over actual observed experiments. And many of us either downplay our sexual … [Read Entire Story]

How to Be More Patient – With Life, Others, and Yourself

Often feel frustrated? Or known for giving up or changing your mind? How to be more patient if it’s not your natural state of being? The art of patience Patience is the art of staying calm and waiting it out, even when we are frustrated or are facing obstacles. Having patience is desirable because it … [Read Entire Story]

What Sarcasm Means About Your Mental Health

by Andrea Blundell Known for your wit and humour? But of the sarcastic kind? What does sarcasm mean about you, really? The meaning of sarcastic Sarcasm is far more than just being funny.  It’s clear even in the dictionary definition of, “using remarks that clearly mean the opposite of what you say, in order to … [Read Entire Story]

10 Signs of Emotional Maturity – Do You Measure Up?

by Andrea Blundell Yes, we might be grownups in these parts, at least physically. Emotional maturity can come far, far later…. Or we might not even quite be there yet. What is emotional maturity, really, and do you have it? What is emotional maturity? Emotional maturity means we are responsible for, and in control of, … [Read Entire Story]

Is it a ‘Superiority Complex’ that’s the Problem?

Is a colleague or acquaintance so full of themselves it makes you want to scream? Alway bragging and showing off? Is it a superiority complex, or something different? And why does it matter? The original definition of ‘superiority complex’ A ‘superiority complex’ is a term that was first coined in the early 1900s by respected … [Read Entire Story]

Depression and Relationships – 10 Ways One Affects the Other

by Andrea Blundell Acting differently with your partner and can’t stop? Or dating someone who is not themselves lately, and wonder if it is depression? What is it you need to know about depression and relationships?  Depressed, or sad? We all feel low at times. But sadness and depression are not the same. Depression can … [Read Entire Story]

“Why Am I So Mean to My Partner?”

by Andrea Blundell Nice to others, but once you are alone with your partner, another side roars out? Keep asking yourself, ‘why am I so mean to my partner?’ Why can’t I stop being so mean?  It’s a loaded question. And the answer might be something entirely different than you expect. It also varies depending … [Read Entire Story]

Skills for Healthy Romantic Relationships | Joanne Davila | TEDxSBU

Nostalgia – is Missing the Past Good or Bad for You?

Often think about your past? Or wish you could go back in time and have the life you had? Or the world we all once had before the coronavirus pandemic? Nostalgia has direct implications on our mental health. What is nostalgia? Nostalgia is a longing for our past, albeit a possibly romanticised version. We can … [Read Entire Story]

Do “Energy Vampires” Really Exist? The Real Danger You Need to Know

by Andrea Blundell Are ‘energy vampires’ really a thing, from the point of view of psychotherapy? And is the term helpful, or is it possibly dangerous? What is an ‘energy vampire? An ‘energy vampire’ or ‘emotional vampire’ isn’t, evidently, a clinical term or a diagnosis. It’s instead a modern shorthand for someone who leaves [Read Entire Story]

Peter Pan Syndrome – Is It Always a Bad Thing?

Feel like everyone wants you to be something you aren’t? Been told you need to ‘grow up’, or that you have ‘Peter Pan syndrome’? What is Peter Pan syndrome? No, it is not a real psychological diagnosis. But it’s a helpful catch phrase to refer to other mental health issues. Peter Pan syndrome refers to … [Read Entire Story]

Always Complaining? – Moaning and Mental Health

by Andrea Blundell Complaining about something you’ve been holding onto for ages with a good friend leaves you feeling better. But when a colleague and you complain with each other about your boss yet again, you feel drained. What does it all mean? In the end, is moaning good or bad for you? It does … [Read Entire Story]

Is What Your Partner Did Sexually Abusive?

Did your partner cross a line sexually, and you are wondering if it is or isn’t sexually abusive? What is and isn’t a sexually abusive relationship as two adults? What is sexual abuse in a relationship? Sexual abuse in adult relationships, also called ‘intimate partner sexual violence’, is unwanted sexual activity you’ve been made to … [Read Entire Story]

Accepting What Is – Is It Really a Good Idea?

by Andrea Blundell Does your life always have a conflict or two on the go? Constantly dreaming of being somewhere else? Or fighting your way forward? Accepting what is could be a tool you need. What is acceptance? In psychology, acceptance is closely linked to allowing, and to the present moment. What is happening right … [Read Entire Story]

Compromise in Relationships – the Good, the Bad, and How to Tell the Difference

by Andrea Blundell Unless you are dating or friends with your own personal clone, you are going to at some point face a difference of opinion. How you compromise in relationships will either make or eventually break your connection. Define compromise in relationships? Compromise in relationships is about meeting in the middle. You find a … [Read Entire Story]

Emotional Self Regulation – What is it All About?

Act before you think? Say things only to regret all? Explode your emotions onto others despite promising not to? Your issue might be emotional self-regulation. What is emotional self regulation? Emotional self-regulation is psychology speak for an ability to control your emotional responses in an acceptable and productive way. You know how to take charge … [Read Entire Story]

Emotional Self Regulation – Struggle to Stay Calm?

Act before you think? Say things only to regret all? Explode your emotions onto others despite promising not to? Your issue might be emotional self-regulation. What is emotional self regulation? Emotional self-regulation is psychology speak for an ability to control your emotional responses in an acceptable and productive way. You know how to take charge … [Read Entire Story]

9 Ways Defensiveness is Ruining Your Relationships

by Andrea Blundell Does your partner or friend keep saying, ‘you are so defensive’? Which just makes you feel, well… like you need to defend yourself? It might be time to consider how defensiveness is damaging your relationships. How Defensiveness Ruins Your Relationships 1. It makes you a very bad listener. When we are defensive, … [Read Entire Story]

9 Ways to Handle Feeling Hurt

Has someone you loved betrayed you? A friend left you feeling rejected? Or a colleague let you down? What can you do if you are left feeling hurt? What to Do If You Are Feeling Hurt 1. Let yourself feel what you need to feel.   Repressing our emotions can be like keeping a beach … [Read Entire Story]

Narcissistic Parenting – Was This Your Childhood?

by Andrea Blundell Often wonder if your current issues have to do with the way you were parented? And worry that the lack of unconditional love but copious amounts of control you dealt with as a child might mean you suffered narcissistic parenting? A study published in the International Journal of Psychology and Psychological Therapy … [Read Entire Story]

Lying in Relationships – Is it Really a Big Deal?

by Andrea Blundell How serious is lying in relationships – are you overreacting? And why do you keep attracting liars? Do we all lie? An oft-quoted American study on how often we lie a day came in at between once to twice (1.65 times, to be exact). It’s true that lying is part of the … [Read Entire Story]